Slouchy Beanies and Newspaper Mushrooms

Life is about the making the days count, right?

Well, these days are counting.

God has given me a home. 

Let me tell you a little something, folks. Let Christ be your focus. Make Christ your focus. Share your heart and wash your hands. Heavenly Father will place the little things you need right in your hands and he wants you to set them free; to use your fingers to paint not only his words, but your life on to the sidewalks. Leave your light in the road, and your spirit on the chair. 

If you let Christ become your focus, he will let your life become his focus. Keep your goals on the line, and tell God what you want. No, actually, breathe, and share with him. Share with him your plans, and let him carry you. 

It's okay to be different, it's okay to be confused and it's okay to not know what's going to happen next. He knows, my darlings, he knows. Hold his gold plated hands and kiss his feet. 

1 Nephi 2:19-22

"19 And it came to pass that the Lord spake unto me, saying: Blessed art thou, Nephi, because of thy afaith, for thou hast sought me diligently, with lowliness of heart.

 20 And inasmuch as ye shall keep my commandments, ye shallaprosper, and shall be led to a bland of promise; yea, even a land which I have prepared for you; yea, a land which is choice above all other lands.

 21 And inasmuch as thy brethren shall rebel against thee, they shall be acut off from the presence of the Lord.

 22 And inasmuch as thou shalt keep my commandments, thou shalt be made a aruler and a teacher over thy brethren"

"Who picks out your outfits, Carolyn?"

enduringly,morgan.

I Don't Know About Yours, But This Is My Truth

I don't want to say, "Remember when?" because that won't bring anything back. 

Here is the deal, I didn't want to write a big teen cliche "breakup" post, but currently, that's what's rolling off my fingers. I'm confused, and hurt, but I respect his decision one hundred percent. If I knew the details, I would let you know. 

Here's what I do know, though:
As many people have told me what to do, for today, I'm going to be sad. I'll find my happy soon, because I know right where it is, but to cope with my confusion, let me be blunt and sad.  Let me wear his tshirts to bed, and listen to all his music. Let me be friends with him still, if that's alright by him. And only if it doesn't toy with my emotions too much, because right now, I'm a bit unsure of what's going on, but too afraid to ask, so what it is now is fine. 

He taught me about family, and gave me his when I needed them most. He gave me an older brother, Matthew, who I know I'll look to, especially through change. He taught me not to worry. I learned what's important, (we'll talk about that later, love.) He taught me how to compromise.  

I learned that I'm harder to deal with then most, and I learned what to look for.

Girls, let me tell you a little something. I need you to learn to love yourself before you can "love" someone else. I loved Turner the way I knew how, and yes I still do;  The way I know how. But that's because I know how to make myself happy. I know how to be happy without someone glued at my hip, but when they are, it's even better. I know how to love God before anyone else, and I know how I work. (Sure, sometimes I forget how to deal with my anxieties, and sometimes it's too hard for others to handle. One day, someone will love my color coded planner and the way I do things. They'll love my almond snacking and the clothes that I wear.)

Things will work out if they're supposed to. And beyond my sad day today I see a beautiful future ahead of me.
Here's to UCLA and UofU. Here's to beginning again. Here's to my photography, and my writing, and my art. 

enduringly,
mo.rgan.